I went to a academic, nerdy high school. We were pretty small, with the student population always under 400 people. This meant that everyone knew everybody and we got along with one another for the most part.
Accurate depiction of my school.
I've tried to keep in touch with some of the them but it hasn't been easy. A lot of them are busy but many of them are too busy because of how successful they've been since we graduated.
All I have to do is look to Facebook and check up on their recent statuses. Two years into University and at least 4 of them had been accepted into medicine. This year at least another 8 of them were accepted. And who knows how many more will get in next year. If you're not going into Medicine than you're probably an Engineer. And while the Engineers have it tough for the 4 years of school they got, after that they're pretty much set for life.
The same thing applies to those in Nursing. I know 2 people who are well on their way to becoming teachers. Several of my classmates are studying abroad and you have people like my girlfriend who are in Pharmacy and also set for life once she graduates. And then there are those who want to pursue Graduate Studies like my friend Adrian. He has his name in a scientific paper already, something to do with string theory.
I tried to read it, my brain hurt afterward.
And for those in the Arts they're doing well too. I have friends who are in graphic design or theater and they too are doing well and are happy with themselves. The Business people seem to know what they're doing and so do those that are becoming Dentists. I look all around me and see a sea of success and bright futures.
And then I look to myself and I wonder where I'm going.
A part of me expects that I should have a better sense of direction. I went to the same school as these people, experienced the same stresses and pressures and even grew up with some of them. They all know where they wanted to go and off they went while I sit here idling and fidgeting.
What to do now.
I don't have all the time or money in the world to figure out what I want to do. I can graduate and get a degree in just one more year. But what will or can I do with it? I guess I could attempt Graduate school like Adrian but my marks and accomplishments certainly aren't as impressive. I mean, the guy has scholarships and achievements going everywhere. He isn't arrogant or boastful though, the guy's a prodigy but refuses to admit it. He was doing calculus when the rest of us were struggling with algebra.
I don't want to attend my High School Reunion and be the only one not doing something with his future. It's not a pleasant or comforting thought, being in a room full of successful and happy people while I realize all I have left is a room in my parents' basement to go to.
Maybe I should keep trying for Medicine like most of classmates, but I'm having my doubts about it. Something I'll share in future blog post.