Happy Birthday Theresa!

It's time for another post about Theresa because it is her birthday tomorrow! Happy birthday to you Darling. I know you get easily embarrassed whenever I have a post dedicated to you on my blog but you've been too busy with Med school to even read my blog so it's all good.

Yay!

I've been finding it more difficult to get her gifts as of late. Simply because I'm running out of creative ideas. I mean, I could go with the generic card, flowers, and a baked good but that's boring. Plus, she hates flowers except for lilacs. And lilacs have to be specially ordered in due to their short lifespan. I would know, I've gotten them before.

Either that or I've been duped and paid extra for nothing.

Why can't Theresa like something more generic like roses?

What I've resorted to then is custom unique gifts. I'm very fond of finding odd things online because I spend way too much time on the Internet. So when a writer on Reddit had a Kickstarter for his horror novel (Theresa loves horror novels even though it prevents her from sleeping) I immediately funded it. Penpal was successfully funded and if you want you probably could find the original story on Reddit if you don't want to buy a copy.

Theresa is also fond of My Little Pony. Now I'm not sure if anyone is aware but the toys released by Hasbro are kind of garbage. I guess it makes sense, these are for kids to throw around and get hidden under furniture and what not. Not to be put on display. So when I found someone who was making high quality resin models I jumped on as soon as possible. It was pricey, I'm not going to lie, but I think it was worth it just because it was unique.

And of course Theresa likes the nerdy one.

The last material gift I got her was a laptop cooler. Hers has been heating up nonstop and we haven't been able to play anything together lately. Well, I like to blame her laptop because blaming Med school is kind of irrational.

I'm hoping to take her somewhere nice for dinner on Saturday, but knowing her, she'll want to go grab tacos or McDonalds. Sweetheart, you're not 8 anymore, you're an adult and it's not proper to have Happy Meals on your birthday as an adult.

Oh wait, I've gotten her Happy Meals before.

. . . .

Screw it, I'll get her whatever she wants. It's her birthday, she calls the shots.

Happy 4th Anniversary

I can't believe it's been 4 years already. Well, Monday marks the 4 year anniversary between Theresa and I. Yes I know, 4 years isn't that long compared to some of you who are already married but for someone who's about to turn 22, 4 years is a long time. That's almost 20% of my life being with someone.

And I couldn't imagine being with anyone else.

This is where you go "d'aww" or puke.

If you haven't read the story of how we hooked up, you can read about it here. I'd like to dedicate this post to her. And I know she is going to get embarrassed when she finally reads this. I highly doubt she's reading my blog while on her vacation to China because China has really terrible internet.

This is probably the mushiest post I've ever typed up so if you hate that kind of stuff, I'd advise you to stop right now and leave a comment about bacon or something. It's fine, I understand.

So where do I start about her?

Yes, where to being?

Theresa and I went to an academic high school. The so called "best" students from each Junior High were pulled and placed there. But despite being one of the best of the best in our graduating class she mostly kept to herself, never boasting her accomplishments and didn't draw attention. That was the kind of girl she was. Humble, demure, and reserved. She acted in every way a classy lady.

And then you had me, on the opposite spectrum.

I ranked somewhere in average rank in terms of grades and my personality was completely different. If my somewhat taller physique didn't make me more already noticeable, some off-hand comment or remark would do the job just as well. Most people either found me to be good company or absolutely irritating. I saw things in a different light and that was reflected in my mannerisms. I'd been called many things before, but "boyfriend material" was not usually one of them.

And so imagine the surprise of our classmates (and myself) when Theresa agreed to date me.

Probably something like this.

University life has not exactly been the easiest thing for me. And at any given time Theresa could have left me for a boyfriend with a brighter future. Someone drowning in scholarships, with a 4.0 GPA or stable career path.

But she didn't.

Despite any problems we may have had, regardless of my shortcomings and failures, and even against the wishes of her parents she continued to date and love me unconditionally. She isn't secretly crazy with bodies hidden in a basement, she doesn't have unpredictable mood swings, nor is she using me for her own personal or financial goals. The only thing she asks of me is my company which I am more than happy to give.

Pretty much my reaction whenever I see her online.

Seriously, what more could I ask for in a significant other? I'm actually having trouble typing this post up not because I'm running out of things to say, but because everytime I think of something to say I stop typing and end up lost in thought, just thinking about her. All while having this stupid grin on my face.

And then I snap out of it and I try to compose my thoughts in a coherent and elegant manner. You know, without sounding like some obsessed fanboy. I'm trying so hard to describe this wonderful person in my life and I really don't think I'm doing her justice.

So before I start rambling like an idiot, I'm just going to wrap up quickly here. Theresa has been an irreplaceable part of my life and means the world to me. I know I'd be a completely different person had she not said yes 4 years ago and for that, I am extremely grateful.

Thank you for 4 wonderful years Dear, I love you.

How Ponies may have Saved my Relationship

Back in this post I alluded to how Theresa was avoiding me. I attributed it to the stress that Pharmacy school causes and maybe she just didn't have time to talk to me. But then I see that she's talking with other people online on Facebook and what not. And I get thinking, lately, all we've talked about is school and stress and that's pretty negative. Maybe she's tired of talking about such depressing stuff with me.

Or maybe she's thinking of breaking up with me.

Uh oh.

I know some of you are thinking "Damian, you silly derp. That's quite the jump you're making. Why would you assume something like that?".

Well you see, Theresa is known for her cold shoulder. She can ignore someone for months on end and have no problems with it. That's actually how she broke up with her last boyfriend. She just stopped talking with him, avoided him for a couple months and they just drifted apart.

I couldn't let the same happen to me. There had to be a way to get her to talk to me again but also make it a positive occasion.

But how...

Hmmm...

And then I notice something on Reddit. Something from the My Little Pony subreddit.

My Little Pony toys were being offered at McDonald's.

Theresa loves My Little Pony. Theresa loves Happy Meals.

I was going to go get her Happy Meals with My Little Pony toys and everything will be better.

I am a genius.

Unless it's Pinkie Pie. Good lord does she hate Pinkie Pie.

So I run out one afternoon and make my purchase at the nearest McDonald's and somehow manage to get a few words out of Theresa. Enough to convince her to meet up with me after class so I can give her this stuff.

And you know what? It worked.

It was nice to see her smile and laugh again. Seriously, she's been miserable for the last two weeks due to all the exams, presentations and seminars that Pharmacy has been throwing at her. Though I think she was more amused that a grown man walked into McDonald's to buy Happy Meals for the My Little Pony toys.

And then we sat down and watched her favorite pony be mean to her least favorite one.

She's still teasing me about buying the Happy Meals but whatever, she's talking to me again. And you know what, maybe I did overreact a bit, I'm probably too paranoid for my own good.

But better safe than sorry. Lack of communication is a killer to any relationship.

Hello Dear

When I'm offline I generally don't enjoy talking about myself or sharing information. When asked even the smallest personal question I try to be as vague as possible or distract from said question. I guess this is partially why almost no one I know in real life knows about this blog.

Note that I said almost. There are things you can hide from people for so long and all it took was a glance over my shoulder and the following question:

She probably had this expression on her face too.

So I'd like to say hello to my girlfriend Theresa, who you may or may not have heard about already. I don't know when she'll get around to reading this post, and I hope she weren't serious when she said she was going to read all the posts. My blog reads like a poorly written fanfiction.

Yes Dear, I whine about everything and everything. And yes I call my girlfriend Dear. I know it makes me sound like an old man but I think calling your significant other something like "BABEE GURL" is condescending.

I LUV U 5EVA CUZ 5 IS MOAR THEN 4.

Does this mean a change in my way of posting? Not really, I'm still going to be the same derpy Damian you've come to know and love. If anything, I can't ask you guys about gift suggestions for Theresa anymore. Can't risk having her spoil the surprise.

Oh, I guess there'll be more pictures of cute things. You guys love koalas, corgis and cats right?

Seriously, if this doesn't distract her from the rest of my blog, nothing will.

You know what, to be safe, here's another:

Puppy!

Love you Dear, hope I haven't embarrassed you too much in front of all the internet strangers.

Theresa

Thanks again for the encouragement and kind thoughts. The last post was pretty depressing again so let's talk about someone who always makes me smile, my girlfriend Theresa.

We met in High School but never really interacted with one another until our final year. This wasn't much of a surprise as our interests were rather different and so were our personalities. Obnoxious, loud and derpy Damian contrasts with quiet, polite and demure Theresa.

Wow, I'm gorgeous.

I wasn't really looking for a relationship at the time. I was pretty fed up with girls after being rejected by a lesbian and then several months later being dumped by another girl in just three days. That would change at a party. A fellow classmate had rented out a cabin by a lake and invited everyone to go. And while everyone was getting drunk, the following conversation happened between Theresa and I.

Damian: *Obnoxious comment about fellow student*
Theresa: *Eye roll and sigh of disapproval*
D: What was that for?
T: Nothing.
D: You dislike him just as much as I do, what was that for?
T: Seriously, nothing.

Oh Damian, you charmer you.

I was persistent in figuring out why she had acted so coldly to me. Could have been the alcohol in my blood, maybe I was bored but whatever the reason I ended up following her around which is really creepy in retrospect. She didn't care and eventually we started talking about life, ourselves, anything possible and found out we had a lot more in common than we first thought. I still remember standing beside her while we watched the sunrise over the lake.

Meanwhile, the rest of our classmates were puking in garbage bags or passed out so I think I did pretty well.

Awesome.

We ended up talking a lot more and decided to see what would happen if we unofficially hooked up. We were both aware that High School relationships didn't usually go well (if our friends were any indicator), had pretty bad relationships in the past and had no idea what we were getting into.

Thirteen days later I take her out for lunch and ask if she'd actually be my girlfriend.

She said yes.

And we've been happily together for 3 years and 2 months now (or if you want the creepy answer: 1172 days, 21 hours, 56 minutes and 11 seconds as of this post). 

Yeah, clearly in the creepy category

I used to be told that no one would ever want to date me (and rightfully so) but here I am, defying the odds with a beautiful, smart and funny woman who loves me back. She means the world to me and nothing warms the leftovers of my heart more than her smile.

If there is any interest I could also share the story about my two other failed attempts at a relationship. I don't mind, I actually find them kind of funny now. But that's only if my readers are interested, I don't want to bore any of you.